双语：胆怯没有什么大不了(2)

　　Next time you are in an uncomfortable situation, shift your focus to someone else and ask yourself how you can help them or add value to their lives.

　　下次如果你处于别扭的情形中，就把自我身上的注意力转到别人身上吧，并且问问自己怎样才能帮助他们或者给他们的人生增添价值。

　　Be interested instead of trying to be interesting.

　　对周围感兴趣，而非让周围对你感兴趣

　　Make the focus of every conversation about someone else at first. This will take the pressure off of you and make them feel significant. Asking questions and genuinely caring about what the person says immediately gets you out of your own head and makes the person feel special.

　　开始要将注意力集中在和别人的每场对话中。这能减少压力并且别人也能找到存在感。无论对方在谈论何事，你都要及时提点问题并且由衷地关心，这样才能避免你沉浸在自我的世界中，同时说话的人也会感到有意义。

　　Be mindful not to interrogate, but simply show a curiosity about their world. Actually listen to their voice and less to that voice of doubt in your head.

　　注意不要去打断别人，可以时不时地表现出你的好奇。要真正地听取对方的话，而不要在脑袋中质疑内容的正确与否。

　　Your outcome is to have the confidence to create more authentic relationships with people. In order to do that you must build a comfortable bond with them. When you discover more about someone, connect your similar interests to create that bond.

　　你的目的是有信心去建立更加牢靠的关系。为了做到这一点你必须在彼此间找到对味的话题。当你更加了解一个人之后，你仍要兴趣不减地继续创造那种话题。

　　How will you start to be more interested in people? Will you ask them about their job, their taste in music, or an experience they had? Next time you do, seek for common interests to build a bond.

　　那你要怎样才能做到对一个人更加感兴趣呢?你会问及他们的工作，音乐的品味或者曾有过的经历吗?下次问别人的时候，找一个共同感兴趣的话题。

　　Embrace vulnerability.

　　拥抱脆弱

　　Trying to pretend that you are not nervous makes people nervous.

　　故作镇定只会让别人不淡定。

　　I was in a small workshop one time, shaking in my shoes. I just came right out and said, “You know what, you guys? This is my first time speaking in front of you and I'm terrified! Yikes!” Everyone opened up and started joking around. It broke the ice. I immediately felt more comfortable because I felt a part of them.

　　有一次在一个小车间里，我紧张得双脚哆嗦。于是我就站了起来然后说道，“伙计们，你们知道吗?这是我第一次在大家面前发言，紧张死了!哎呀!”众人听了都放开了，接着开始说笑。尴尬的局面就这样被打破。我瞬间觉得不忐忑了，因为找到了归属感。

　　Brené Brown, an expert in vulnerability (yes, there is actually an expert in vulnerability)， says that courage actually comes from vulnerability. Ironically, people actually find vulnerability endearing. It makes them want to protect you, it makes you human, and it makes you relatable.

　　布勒。布朗是脆弱专家(确实，真的有这种专家)，他说勇气实则源自脆弱。滑稽的是，人们事实上觉得脆弱是讨喜的事。因为那能让别人对你产生保护欲，而你也因此才具人性，这是能产生共鸣的特点。

　　Trust me, I hung out with the cool kids and the oddballs, too. They are all the same. Everyone freaks out at some time or another. Be vulnerable. It's OK!

　　相信我，潮人和异类我都接触过。二者都一样。但人们有时就是排斥其中之一。所以，脆弱没什么大不了!