英语幽默笑话短文

焯杰分享 2016-07-26 17:45:37

　　笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松，在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面学习啦小编为大家带来英语幽默笑话短文，希望大家喜欢!

　　英语幽默笑话短文1：

　　A woman came into our bank to get a check cashed，but she didn't have an account with us. When I asked her for some identification, she showed me several charge cards，her Social Security card and a library card. I told her we needed a driver's license，but she didri t have one.

　　一位妇女来到我们银行想兑换一张支票，但她在我们这儿没建立帐户。当我问她要证明材料时，她把社会保险卡、图书卡拿给我看。我告诉她我们要看她的驾驶证，她说她没有。

　　"Don't you have something with your picture on it?"I asked.

　　“难道你就没带照片的东西吗?”

　　"Oh, sure,"she said as she flipped to a family photo in her wallet. "That's me in the back row. "

　　“噢，有啊，”她边说边从钱包里拿出一张合家照，“站在后排的那个就是我。”

　　英语幽默笑话短文2：

　　My secretary began to post unusual news articles,cartoons and pictures of faraway lands on our office bulletin board. Although she changed the items on a regular basis，no one mentioned her efforts.Eventually she put up a notice stating that she would give one dollar to the first person who read the announcement and informed her about it. Two weeks later, she received her first acknowledgement，a handwritten reply left on her desk:"I just wanted you to know how much I enjoy your interesting bulletin board. The Cleaning Lady.”

　　我的秘书开始在我们办公室的布告栏里张贴一些奇持的新闻、卡通和风景画等。按时更换，但从未有人提到过她所做出的努力。终于她贴出了一张告示说，谁要是第一个看到她贴的通知，就可以告诉她，那个人就能从她那里得到一美元。两周后，她接到了第一个正式的通知。在她的桌上留着一张字条:“我只想让你知道，我非常喜欢看那有趣的布告栏。清洁工。”

　　英语幽默笑话短文3：

　　Stepping from my kitchen into the garage, I accidentally locked myself out of the house. When I tried to persuade my 18-month-old son，Taylor, to open the door, none of my tactics worked. Finally，I walked around the house to check for an open window. To my amazement，I found the front door open and Taylor standing there with a salesman.

　　出了厨房我便走进了车库，不留神把门锁给撞上了，把我自己锁在了门外。我那18个月的儿子泰勒在屋里。于走，我在外边千方百计地想让他帮我开门，结果均告失败。最后，我围着房子想找个开着的窗子。令我吃惊的是，前门开着，我的儿子站在门口正与一个推销员在谈话。

　　"I've been locked out for 20 minutes,"I said. "How did you get him to open the door?"

　　我对那推销员说:“我被锁在了外边20多分钟，你是怎样让他给你开门的”。

　　Looking puzzled，the man replied，“I rang the doorbell."

　　面带惊奇的推销员答说:“我只按了一下门铃。”

　　英语幽默笑话短文4：

　　A motorist got caught in one of those new radar traps.He had been driving home one night when the automatic camera identified his car as exceeding the speed limit, Soon after，he received a ticket in the mail，plus a picture of this vehicle with the date and speed recorded on it.

　　一个飞车手被新的雷达测速仪捕获。那是他在一天晚上超速驾车回家时，被自动照像机摄下了他的汽车。不久，他便收到了一个装有罚款单的信封，里面装有他汽车的照片、超速的日期和速度。

　　Duly impressed, he sent back the ticket, along with a photo of a 0 bill to pay the fine.

　　他对这种方式的印象极为深刻，于是寄回了那张罚款单，并附上了一张一百元美金的照片作为罚金。

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