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英语儿童幽默小笑话阅读

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  心情郁闷时,一则超级搞笑的笑话会让你瞬间忘掉不开心的事情,这里有笑破你的肚子的笑话大全,小编今天就给大家带来了英语的笑话,今天我们就一起来看看笑话爆笑吧!

  英语笑话一

  一个律师打开他的宝马车门,突然一辆汽车驶过来把门撞飞了,警察赶到现场,律师正痛苦地抱怨毁坏了他心爱的宝马。“警察同志,看看他们把我的车弄的!!!”律师哀怨地说。“你们律师真是物质至上,我很不舒服!”警察反驳说,“你这么关心你可恶的宝马,你可能没有注意到你的左胳膊也没了。”律师终于注意到了血淋淋的左肩膀,“天哪,我的劳力士手表在哪儿?”A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW."Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeemer!!!", he whined."You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick!!!" retorted the officer, "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!!!"

  英语笑话二

  MytwosistersandIwereallawayatdifferentcollegesatthesametime.Oneday,afterfacingtoomanycrisisandtiredofbeingtreatedjustanotherundergraduate,Iphonedhomeforsomeconsolation1andunderstandingofmyuniqueproblems.  我和两个妹妹同时离开家去不同的大学读书。经历了太多的危机,也厌倦了受到与其他大学生的对待之后,有一天我给家里打了个电话,就我独有的问题寻求安慰和理解。  Whenmydadanswered,Iimmediatelylaunchedintomylitanyoffrustrations2withcollegelife.AsIpausedtocatchmybreath,hesaid,"OK,honeynow,firstofall,whoisthis?”  爸爸接起电话后,我立刻开始历数我大学生活中的挫折。当我停下来歇口气时,爸爸说:“好啦,亲爱的……现在,首先告诉我,你是哪一个?”

  英语笑话三

  Jack1hadgonetotheuniversitytostudyhistory,butattheendofhisfirstyear,hishistoryprofessorfailedhiminhisexaminations2,andhewastoldthathewouldhavetoleavetheuniversity.However,hisfatherdecided3thathewouldgotoseetheprofessortourgehimtoletJackcontinuehisstudiesthefollowingyear.  杰克在一所大学学历史。第一学期结束时,历史课教授没让他及格。学校让他退学。然而,杰克的父亲决定去见教授,强烈要求让杰克继续来年的学业。  "He’sagoodboy,"saidJack’sfather,"andifyoulethimpassthistime,I’msurehe’IIimprovealotnextyearandpasstheexaminationsattheendofitreallywell.”  “他是个好孩子,”杰克的父亲说,“您要是让他这次及格,我相信他明年会有很大进步,学期结束时,他一定会考好的。”  "No,no,that’squiteimpossible,"repliedtheprofessorimmediately.“Doyouknow,lastmonthIaskedhimwhenNapoleonhaddied,hedidn'tknow”  “不,不,那不可能,”教授马上回答,“你知道吗?上个月我问他拿破仑什么时候死的,他都不知道。”  "Pleasesir,givehimanotherchance,"saidJack’sfather."YouseeI'mafraidwedon’ttakeanynewspaperinourhouse,sononeofusevenknowsthatNapoleonwasill,"  “先生,请再给他一次机会吧。”杰克的父亲说,“你不知道,恐怕是因为我们家没有订报纸。我们家的人连拿破仑病了都不知道。”


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