对待批评的建议双语
享受失败的乐趣。 重新转化这个事情,拥抱批评.接下来,小编给大家准备了对待批评的建议双语,欢迎大家参考与借鉴。
对待批评的建议双语
I have a very hard time being criticized, corrected, or accused – even of the smallest mistakes – and I react very angrily. I’ve wrestled1 this instinct under control in a professional context, more or less, but I have more trouble with it at home. All it takes is for the Big Girl to say something like,"You forgot to remind me to bring my library book," to send me into a tirade2. "What do you mean…it's not my responsibility…I didn’t know Wednesday was Library Day…" etc., etc.
对我哪怕是最微小的一个批评、纠正或指责,我都会很难接受——而且我会做出十分愤怒的反应。在职业中,我会将这种本能遏制住,但是在家里却难以做到。只需要大女儿说类似:“你忘记提醒我要带图书馆图书”就能让我言辞激烈。“你是什么意思..这不是我的事..我又不知道星期三是图书馆日...”诸如此类的话。
More and more, I see the connection between perfectionism, control, and anger. Zoikes, how I try to be more mild-mannered and easy-going! Here are some of the strategies that I try to use to accept criticism. If I manage to use them, they never fail me, but it can be hard to have the mindfulness needed to apply them.
我越来越发现完美主义、控制和愤怒之间的关系。啊,我是多么努力在要做到更温文尔雅、更随和!下面是我用来接受批评时的策略中的一些。如果我用上它们,就绝对不会让我失望,但是要有一个清醒头脑去用它们却是一件困难的事情。
1. Listen to what a critic is saying. Really listen, try to understand that point of view, don’t just nod while you formulate3 your retorts.
听一听批评者在说什么。真正倾听,试图了解观点,不要一边点头,一边准备自己的反驳。
2. Don't be defensive4. This is the toughest step for me. With my writing, for example, I always have to take a deep breath before reading an edit letter or meeting with an editor, to remind myself, "I welcome criticism. This person is helping5 me. I’m eager to hear how to improve my book/article/post." Act the way you want to feel! That's my Third Commandment. Along the same lines…
不要用防御心理。对我来说这是最难的一步。例如,在我写作时,我总要在阅读编辑的信或和编辑见面前深吸一口气,来提醒自己:“我欢迎批评。这个人在帮助我。我渴望听一听如何改善我的书/文章/帖子的话”。 你希望获得怎样的感受就怎样去做!这是我的第三条戒律。同理...
3. Don't fire back by criticizing your critic. Your comments will just sound defensive, and you'll escalate6 the exchange. This urge is very difficult to resist, because the impulse to justify7 and attack is strong when you feel criticized, but it just isn't helpful, and it certainly isn’t effective.
不要批评你的批评者来反击。 你的话只会听上去有防御心,而且你将会将“交火”升级。这样的冲动很难抵制,因为要理论、攻击对方的冲动在你感觉受到批评时是很强烈,但这并没有帮助,也肯定是没有效果的。
4. Delay your reaction. Count to ten, take a deep breath, sleep on it, wait until the next day to send that email…any kind of delay is good. A friend told me that she has a rule for herself: when she's upset about something that happened at her children's school, she won't let herself do anything about it for three days – and usually she decides that no action is better than action.
延迟你的反应。 数到10、做深呼吸、隔一宿、等到第二天再发出那封电子邮件。任何类别的延迟都有帮助。一位朋友曾告诉我一条她自己的规定:当她对某件发生在她的孩子学校力的事情感到生气,她让自己3天什么也不做--而且往往她认为不采取行动比行动更好。
5. Explain honestly the reason for your actions. Sometimes it's tempting8 to re-characterize your actual feelings and motives9. Usually, though, that just complicates10 things more. It becomes impossible to have an honest exchange.
诚实地解释你的行为。有时候,改变你的实际的感受和意图是很诱人的做法。但通常这只会让事情更复杂化,让诚实的交流没有可能。
6. Admit your mistakes. This is extremely effective and disarming11. When I got my first job, my father told me, "If you take the blame, you'll get the responsibility." I've found that to be very true. Difficult, but true. Admitting mistakes is the first step, then…
承认自己的错误。 这是极为有效、消解的方法。当我获得第一份工作时,我的父亲曾告诉我:“如果你承担了责备,你将会获得责任” 我发现这一点很正确。难但是却正确。承认错误是第一步,接下来...
7. Explain what you've learned. If you can show a critic that you've learned something, you prove that you've understood the criticism and tried to act on it. That, itself, usually mollifies critics.
解释你已经学到了什么。如果你能向一位批评者展示你学到了某样东西,那么你在证明自己已经理解了批评,并且试图采取行动。这本身就能让批评者安静下来。
8. Enjoy the fun of failure. Re-frame the issue entirely12 to embrace criticism. Fact is, trying new things and aiming high opens you to criticism. I tell myself to Enjoy the fun of failure to try to re-frame failure and criticism as part of the fun. Otherwise, my dread13 of criticism can paralyze me.
What am I overlooking? Have you found any other strategies that work for you?
享受失败的乐趣。 重新转化这个事情,拥抱批评。事实上,尝试新事物、眼光高都会让你更容易被批评。在《享受失败的乐趣》一文中我告诉自己重建失败、批评,将它们作为乐趣的一部分。不然的话,我对批评的恐惧将让我行为瘫痪。
我漏掉了什么没有?你有没有发现其它有用的方法?
扩展:过节给老板送礼注意事项六则
Are you considering adding your boss to your gift-giving list this year?
"Tread1 carefully," warns Jo Bennett, partner in the New York City executive2 search firm Battalia Winston. "It's not all that common and I think if you want to give a gift to your boss, you need to think about what's in it for you."
Here are some simple do's and don'ts to keep your holiday giving happy.
今年,你考虑送老板礼物吗?
来自Battalia Winston高级人才搜寻公司合伙人Jo Bennett说:“给老板送礼要谨慎。送老板礼物并不是一个普遍的现象。如果你希望给老板送礼物的话,你需要考虑自己有什么好处。”
下面是一些简单的注意事项,它们让节日送礼成为一件愉快的事。
1、Do your homework. 准备
Buying your boss a gift is just like any other workplace project. So research the history of gift-giving in your office:
给老板买礼物就如同任何工作中的一个项目。所以,调查以往的送礼情况:
Do people give gifts to the boss? 人们(在过节)给老板送礼物吗?
If so, what kind? 如果送的话,是送哪类礼物?
Has it ever backfired for any of your coworkers, and if so, how?
曾经出现过有同事送礼后适得其反的情况吗?有的话,是如何发生的?
2、Don't make your boss uncomfortable. 不要让老板感觉不自在
Now that you know the tradition, think about why you want to give your boss a gift in the first place.
"If the answer is because you want to curry3 favor, I wouldn't do it," said Bennett. "The risk is that your boss will see it as trying to twist the relationship and get an advantage. You don't want to make your boss uncomfortable."
既然你了解了过去送礼习惯,下面来考虑自己到底为什么要送老板礼物。
Bennett说:“如果回答是因为你想去讨好,要我可不会送。风险在于你的老板可能把礼物看作扭曲关系真相、占便宜的行为。你可不希望让对方感觉不自在。”
3、Do be sincere4. 真诚
The best reason to give your boss a gift is to thank him or her for a specific act of kindness during the year that went "above and beyond the call of duty," Bennett said.
"Maybe your boss smoothed over a particular issue you had with a customer," she suggested. "Or maybe your boss gave you some great career advice. In that case, give something small with a nice card of genuine5 thanks."
Bennett说,给老板送礼物最好的理由是感谢他/她在过去一年里做出过的”超出工作范围之外“的某个具体善举。
她建议“也许你的老板为你解决了你与客户之间的特定问题。或者你的老板给了你某些很好的事业建议。这个情况下,送点东西并附上一张漂亮的真诚感谢的卡片”
4、Don't get personal. 不要送个人化的礼物
The worst gifts for bosses are expensive or personal, said Dallas-based business etiquette6 expert Colleen Rickenbacher, author of "Be on Your Best Business Behavior."
"The bottom line is always, 'Don't give something that touches the body,'" she said. Avoid clothes or perfume7. Even flowers could be perceived8 as overly personal and start coworkers gossiping.
《展现你最佳职业行为》一书作者、来自达拉斯市的商务礼仪专家Colleen Rickenbacher说,给老板最糟糕的礼物是那些昂贵的或者个人化的礼物。
她说:“最重要的一点‘不要送和身体有接触的’”。 回避送衣服、香水。即便是花也可能被当成过于个人化、惹来同事闲谈的礼物。
5、Do cut costs. 减少成本
One of the best ways to give your boss a gift, say both Rickenbacher and Bennett, is to buy her something as a team. If each person gives , you can give your boss a gift certificate9 to her favorite restaurant or buy him a pricier gift that his assistant recommends.
That way, no one gets singled out as a brown-noser, and everyone shares the holiday spirit.
Or consider something inexpensive and consumable: jam you make at home, wine made in your garage, or cookies are all simple and genuine ways to share the holiday spirit without crossing any lines.
Rickenbacher与Bennett都认为给老板送礼的最好方法就是合伙买礼物。如果每人出10美元,你就能给老板一张最喜爱餐馆的用餐礼卡或购买某个来自老板助手推荐的价格较昂贵的礼物。
这样不会有个别人被认为是马屁精,而且人人都分享到了节日气氛。
或者,考虑不贵、可消费的东西--家中自制的果酱;自家车库中酿的红酒、或甜饼,这些都是简简单单而地道的分享节日气氛而不会越界的方法。
6、Don't treat your boss like family. 不要像家人一样对待老板
"If someone in your family gives you a gift, you better give one back," said Bennett. "But it's different in an office."
Don't feel the need to reciprocate10 if your boss gives you something. At worst, Rickenbacher said rushing to respond with a gift could end up looking like an afterthought.
"All you have to do when you receive a gift is show appreciation," she said, "and follow up with a thank-you note."
“如果有家人给你一份礼物,你最好回送一份礼物,但是在办公室里却不同。”
如果老板给你某样东西,不要感到有必要回送礼物。Rickenbacher说,一个最糟糕的情况是,匆忙还礼会看起来就像你是后来才想到的。
她说:“当收到老板的一份礼物后,要做的一切只是表达感激,然后送一张感谢卡片。
相关文章:
3.学习啦在线学习网
4.学习啦在线学习网