趣味幽默笑话阅读

　　在日常繁忙的生活，也不要忘记了放松自己。下面学习啦小编为大家带来外国趣味幽默笑话，希望大家喜欢!

　　外国趣味幽默笑话：谁醉了

　　On a pleasant Sunday afternoon an old Englishman and his youngest son were seated in the village inn. The father had partaken liberally of the beer, and was warning his son against the evils of intemperance.

　　在一个阳光明媚的周日午后，一个年长的英国绅士和他年幼的儿子一同坐在村庄的旅店里。父亲没有节制地大口喝着啤酒，并警告他的儿子如果放纵就会给你带来痛苦。

　　"Never drink too much, my son. A gentleman stops when he has enough. To be drunk is a disgrace.”

　　“永远不要喝的太多，我的儿子。一个绅士在喝酒时会适可而止。喝醉了酒可是不太光彩啊。”

　　"Yes, father, but how can I tell when I have enough or am drunk?"

　　“是的，爸爸。但是当我喝的有点过头甚至喝醉了的时候我怎么才能知道呢?”

　　The old man pointed with his fingers.

　　这位年长的父亲伸出手指指向一边。

　　"Do you see those two men sitting in the corner? If you should see four men there .you would know that you were drunk.”

　　“你看见坐在角落的那两个男人了吗?如果你看见的是四个男人坐在那里，那你要意识到你是喝醉了。”

　　The boy looked long and eamestly, After a time in puzzled tones, he said: yes, father, but-but-there is only one man in that corner.”

　　那个男孩认真仔细的看了很久。过了一会之后，他用困惑的声调说到:“是呀，爸爸，但是—但是—在那个角落里只有一个人呀!”

　　外国趣味幽默笑话：冰上钓鱼

　　A drunk decides to go ice fishing, so he gathers his gear and goes walking around until he finds a big patch of ice. He heads into the center of the ice and begins to saw a hole.

　　一个酒鬼打算要去冰上垂钓，于是，他收拾好了用具到四处逛了逛，直到找到了一大块冰。于是他在冰的中心开始锯洞。

　　All of a sudden，a loud booming voice comes out of the sky. "You will find no fish under that ice.”

　　突然之间，一个急速扩大的声音从天空中传来。“你不会在冰的下面找到鱼的。”

　　The drunk looks around, but sees no one. He starts sawing again. Once more, the voice speaks，"as I said before, there are no fish under the ice.”

　　这个酒鬼朝四周看了看，但是没有人。他又开始锯了起来。那个说话人的声音又一次传来:“我刚才已经说过了，冰的下面没有鱼。”

　　The drunk looks all around, high and low, but can’t see a single soul. He picks up the saw and tries one more time to finish.

　　那个酒鬼又向四周从高处到低处的望了一番，但是，连一个人影也没有看见。他又拿起了锯继续进行他的工作。

　　Before he can even start cutting, the huge voice interrupts. "I have warned you three times now. There are no fish!”

　　就在他马上要锯断冰面的时候，一声巨大的喊叫声打断了他:“我现在第三次警告你，这下面没有鱼!”

　　The drunk is now flustered and somewhat scared，so he asks the voice，"how do you know there are no fish? Are you God trying to warn me?"

　　这个酒鬼神情慌张甚至觉得恐惧，于是他问了那个声音:“你怎么知道这下面没有鱼?上帝呀，难道是你在警告我吗?”

　　"No,” the voice replied. "I am the manager of this hockey rink.”

　　“不是，”那个声音回答他:“我是这个冰球场的经理。”

　　外国趣味幽默笑话：优质服务

　　Department一store automatic answering machine:

　　百货公司自动答复机:

　　"If you are calling to order or send money, press 5.”

　　“如果您想定货或者付定金请按5。”

　　"If you are calling to register a complaint, press 645954145452772.”

　　“如果您想登记投诉请按645954145452772”

　　"Have a good day.”

　　“祝您愉快。”