爆笑英语笑话大全带翻译总有你喜欢的
笑话是内容丰富并具有出乎意料结尾的幽默口头故事。笑话几乎涵盖人们生活的所有领域,其中包括政治笑话、经济笑话、家庭生活笑话、关于民族性格的笑话等。学习啦小编分享爆笑英语笑话大全带翻译 ,希望可以帮助大家!
爆笑英语笑话大全带翻译 :an absent-minded professor 健忘教授
No doubt about it, my fellow monk, Father Martin, was a bit of an absent-minded professor. He often filled in for sick priests at other parishes, and one Saturday he found himself on a train to a new destination, frantically searching his pockets for his ticket. "Forget about it, Father," said the conductor, recognizing him as a regular. "I'm sure you paid for a ticket." "I can't forget about the ticket," Father Martin replied nervously. "I need to know where I'm going."
毫无疑问,我的同事、Martin神父是个有点健忘的教授。他经常到别的教区给生病的牧师替班。一个周六,他又坐火车出发了,但到验票时,他却怎么都找不着放在衣服口袋里面的火车票。因为老坐火车,列车员认得教授,因此对他说,“不用找了,我想你肯定已经买过票了。”“我得把票找出来”,Martin神父不安地回答。“我得弄清楚我是要去哪”。
爆笑英语笑话大全带翻译 :哪有人能弯腰弯那么低的啊?
How could anyone stoop so low?
Our manager at the restaurant where I worked was a much beloved, jovial man. But there was one subject you didn't dare discuss in front of him -- his height. Or, should I say, his lack of it. One day, he stormed through the door and announced angrily, "Someone just picked my pocket!" Most of my fellow waitresses and I were speechless, except for the one who blurted out, "How could anyone stoop so low?"
我们的餐厅经理是一位深受大家爱戴,和蔼而又快乐的人。但在他面前有一件事不能提--他的身高。或者,我应该说,他是有点矮!一天,经理怒气冲冲地撞门而入,高声说,
“有人拿了我的钱包!”
我和其她大部女招待都没敢吱声,但有人却蹦出一句话:
“哪有人能弯腰弯那么低的啊”!
爆笑英语笑话大全带翻译 :Shave head 刮头
Recently, a man walked into my barbershop asking how much for a haircut. "Eight dollars," I answered. "And for a shave?" "Five dollars." "All right," he said, settling into the barber chair. "Shave my head."
前些日子,有一男的来到我的理发店,问剪一个头要多少钱。
“八美元,”我告诉他。
“那,刮次胡子呢?”
“五美元”。
“那行”,那男的边说边坐到了理发椅上,“来,给我刮刮头吧”。
爆笑英语笑话大全带翻译 :Speeding 超速
Traveling salesmen make their living visiting as many customers as possible. So speeding to get from one appointment to the next is not unheard-of. Which is how I got pulled over by a highway patrolman. "Don't you ever look at the speedometer?" the officer scolded. Before I knew it, the truth spilled from my mouth. "As fast as I was going," I admitted, "I was afraid to take my eyes off the road."
因为旅行推销员为了谋生需要拜访尽量多的客户,所以超速飞车赶场对于他们来说也不是没有过的事情。有一次我就因为超速度行驶被一个公路巡警拦了下来。“你有没有看过你的时速表?”那名警官责问。当我的回答一出口,我立刻后悔了,但已经太晚了。“车开得越来越快”,我如实地说,“我的眼睛得一直盯着前面,没敢看别的”。
爆笑英语笑话大全带翻译 :一睡醒,你就被炒鱿鱼了
Our co-worker went missing for a few hours, and we tore up the place looking for him. The boss finally found him fast asleep. Rather than wake him, he quietly placed a note on the man's chest. "As long as you're asleep," it read, "you have a job. But as soon as you wake up, you're fired."
我的同事有好几小时不见人了。我们疯了地到处找他。最后老板发现,他正在睡大觉。没叫醒他,老板悄无声息地在我的同事的胸前放了个纸条。“睡觉时”,条上写着,“你是我的员工,醒来你就不是了。”
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