经典简短的英语笑话荐读

　　笑话不再让人发笑的原因:一是由于语言的变迁,二是由于服装的变迁,这是文化变迁的集中表现。下面小编整理了简短的英语笑话，希望大家喜欢!

　　简短的英语笑话摘抄

　　亚伯拉罕.林肯现在做什么?(中英)

　　Based on what you know about him in history books, what do you think Abraham Lincoln would be doing if he were alive today?

　　根据你从历史书了解到的知识.你认为亚伯拉罕·林肯如果今天还活着的话，他会在做什么呢?

　　(1)Writing his memoirs of the Civil War.

　　(1)写有关美国内战的回忆录。

　　(2) Advising the President.

　　(2)向总统提建议。

　　(3) Desperately clawing at the inside of his coffin.

　　(3)在他的棺材里拼命地抓_

　　简短的英语笑话鉴赏

　　你现在要干什么?(中英)

　　After a family meal one night, 3 generations of the family are sitting around chatting. A 4 year old is sitting on her grandfather's knee.

　　晚饭后，祖孙三代人围坐一起聊天，四岁大的孙子坐在祖父的膝盖上。

　　4Yo: "Grandpa, can you make a noise like a frog?"

　　四岁的孙子:“爷爷，你能学青蛙叫吗?”

　　G: "What?"

　　爷爷:“什么?”

　　4Yo: "Can you make a noise like a frog?"

　　四岁的孙子:“你能学青蛙叫吗?”

　　G: "Why do you want me to make a noise like a frog?"

　　爷爷:“为什么想让我学青蛙叫呢?”

　　4Yo: "Well, last night Daddy said that when you croak we can all go to Disneyland.”

　　四岁的孙子:“因为昨晚爸爸说，你像青蛙那样叫了，我们就可以去迪斯尼乐园了?”

　　Luckily the old man took the comment in good humor.

　　幸运的是，对这件事老人一笑了之。

　　简短的英语笑话赏析

　　他们希望什么(中英)

　　Heard this morning on CNN that a lot of the Iraqi troops surrendered when, instead of the foot soldiers they were expecting, American tanks rolled in. Didn’t anybody tell them that Americans never walk anywhere they can drive?

　　今早从美国有线电视网中听到:当美国坦克进攻的时候，伊拉克部队投降了，因为他们原以为来的会是美国步兵。难道在这之前从来就没有人告诉过他们，美军是能开车就决不步行的吗?

　　简短的英语笑话欣赏

　　如果我先死了怎么办(中英)

　　A couple who have been married for 20 years is preparing for bed when the following conversation takes place. . .

　　一对已经结婚20年的夫妇正准备睡觉，然后就有了下面这段对话:

　　She: "Honey, if I die before you, would you remarry?"

　　妻子:亲爱的，如果我死在你前面了，你会再婚吗?

　　He: "That's a morbid question!”

　　丈夫:这是个可怕的问题。

　　She: "No, I really want to know.”

　　妻子:可我真的想知道!

　　He (pauses to think): "Yes, I suppose after a decent amount of time I might Remarry.”

　　丈夫:对，我想在你死了相当长一段时间后，我也许会再婚的。

　　She: "Would she live in our house?"

　　妻子:那她会住我们的房子吗?

　　He: "Well, the mortgage is almost paid off一would you really expect me to move?"

　　丈夫:咱们的抵押贷款已经还清了，难道你真的忍心让我搬家吗?

　　She: "Would she wear my mink coat?"

　　妻子:那她会穿我的貂皮大衣吗?

　　He: "You know I paid幻，500 for that coat- would you really want me to sell it for a loss?"

　　丈夫:你是知道的，我可是花了3500美元买的这件大衣，难道你真的忍心，由于你的去世就让我把这大衣卖了吗?

　　She: "Well, would she drive my BMW?"

　　妻子:那她会开我的宝马吗?

　　He: "No. Absolutely not. She know how to drive a stick shift!”

　　丈夫:不，决不会，她不会开手动档的车。

　　简短的英语笑话品味

　　为什么选择学医(中英)

　　A pipe burst in a doctor's house. He called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumbertype things for a while, and handed the doctor a bill for 0.

　　一个医生家的水管子裂了，他叫来了一个管钳工人。工人到后，打开工具箱，在管子上弄了几下，别人也搞不清他都做了些什么，然后，就递给了医生一张600美元的帐单。

　　The doctor exclaimed, "This is ridiculous! I don’t even make that much as a doctor!" The plumber waited for him to finish and quietly said, "Neither did I when I was a doctor.”

　　医生问:“太可笑了，我做医生也没挣这么多钱啊!”管钳工人等着拿钱时，礼貌地说:“我当医生的时候，也没想到会这样。”