简单英语小笑话一分钟

韦彦分享 2016-09-14 11:51:47

　　近几年,受到国内外文学“突围”的启示,以及文化和谐与民族交流的内在需要,笑话民族文学研究已渐入主流。下面小编整理了简单英语小笑话一分钟，希望大家喜欢!

　　简单英语小笑话一分钟品析

　　牛人不写作业的十大爆笑理由

　　最高科技的理由

　　I have a solar powered calculator and it was cloudy.

　　我用的是太阳能计算器，而当时是阴天。

　　(后面的意思，你懂的~~)

　　最“权威”的理由

　　The District Court of Appeals recently ruled that homework is officially cruel and unusualpunishment.

　　地方法院最近裁定家庭作业是官方的不人道和非常规的惩罚措施。

　　(于是老师颇感鸭梨……)

　　最有爱的理由

　　My mother took it to have it framed.

　　我妈妈把作业装裱了~

　　(总不能棒打母爱吧~)

　　最经典的理由

　　I ran out of toilet paper and had to improvise.

　　厕所没纸了，只能拿作业纸凑合着用了。

　　(亲，这个有点过时了……)

　　最无厘头的理由

　　The nice man with the sign says the end is HERE. No one does homework on the eve of theapocalypse.

　　我看到一个非常和善的先生拿着一个牌子写着：今天大家都完蛋。没人在世界末日前还做家庭作业。

　　最残忍的理由

　　My father had a nervous breakdown and cut it up to make paper dolls.

　　我老爸有点神经失常，把作业剪裁开来折纸玩偶了。

　　(老爸悲催了)

　　最高境界的理由

　　I was too worried about XXXXX in obscure African nations to focus on homework.

　　我十分担心暗藏杀机的非洲国家将面临种族灭绝大屠杀，实在无法集中注意力做作业了。

　　(家事国事天下事，事事关心，无可厚非嘛~)

　　最恶心的理由

　　My dog ate it. Seriously, look I brought a stool sample.

　　作业被狗给吃了。真的，你看，我带来了粪便样本。

　　(人类已经无法阻止狗狗吃作业了)

　　最得瑟的理由

　　Aliens took it as a sample of human handwriting.

　　作业被外星人拿去当人类字迹样本了。

　　(茫茫作业中，选中的就素你的，额~)

　　最直接的理由

　　What homework?

　　什么作业?

　　(装傻时请自觉配合表情~)

　　经典简单英语小笑话一分钟

　　先把车窗摇上去

　　A woman got a dent in her car and took it in to the repair shop.

　　The repairman decided to have a wee bit of fun. So he told her all she had to do was to take it home and blow in the tailpipe until the dent popped itself out.

　　After 15 minutes of this, a lady-one of the woman's friends came over and asked what she was doing.

　　"I'm trying to pop out this dent, but it's not really working."

　　"Duh you have to roll up the windows first!"

　　一位女士把车撞了一个坑,于是就去修车。

　　修理工决定幽她一默。他告诉她,她只需把车开回家,然后从排气管里往车里吹气,直到凹陷处自己鼓起来。

　　这位女士如法操作了15分钟。这时,她的一位女性朋友来拜访她,并问她在做什么。

　　“我正在试着让那个坑鼓起来,但这个办法似乎并不管用。”

　　“嗯……你必须先把车窗摇上去!”

　　关于简单英语小笑话一分钟

　　吝啬鬼请客

　　The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to the fifth floor and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."

　　"Why use my elbow and foot?"

　　"Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-handed, are you?"

　　一个出了名的吝啬鬼终于决定要请一次客了。他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说：“你上到五楼，找中间那个门，然后用你的胳膊肘按门铃。门开了之后，再用你的脚把门推开。”

　　“为什么要用我的肘和脚呢?”

　　“你的双手得拿礼物啊。天哪，你总不会空着手来吧?”吝啬鬼回答。