2019热门英语作文话题
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在网络之外找到缘分
Seeking Relatingship in the Real World
在网络之外找到缘分
Dear Lonely Hearts: Do you spend hours at your computer clicking through, of single people online dating sites? Are you exhausted from tweaking pages on your profile, up dating your photos and emailing potential matches? Are you sick, and tired of feeling rejected when so many of them don't answer?
亲爱的征婚朋友:你是否曾经在网上花几个小时浏览征婚网站上一页一页的单身人士资讯?你是否因为不断调整个人资料、更新个人照片、给有可能发展的交往对象发邮件而感到精疲力尽?而当许多发出去的邮件都石沉大海时，那种被人拒绝的滋味会让你觉得烦了累了吗?
It may be time for you to break up with online dating and try meeting a mate in the scary old-fashioned way: face to face.
对你来说，也许是时候与这种网上交友方式说拜拜了，也是时候尝试通过一种让你觉得害怕但却十分传统的方式与潜在约会对象见面了，这就是:面对面。
For generations people parties, in church through met at or synagogue, friends even horror of horrors at work. But then we went online. We began making, friends Facebook and trolling for potential websites like Match.com and eHarmony.
过去几代人，人们在派对或是教会中相识，通过朋友认识彼此，甚至最糟糕的——在工作中发展恋情。可后来我们上网了。我们开始在Facebook上交朋友，在 Match.com和eHarmony这样的网站上寻找潜在的交往对象。
Sometimes it works. You probably know at least one couple who met online. I know half a dozen. But there's something that's easy to lose sight of: These happy folks aren't typical. Most people never meet their soul mate online. "It's exhausting," says Kate Wachs, a Chicagopsychologist and author of. "Relationships for Dummies." "People burn out really fast."
有时候这种方式的确行之有效。你可能至少认识一对通过网恋走到一起的夫妻。我认识六对。可有一些事情是容易被忽视的:这些幸福的夫妻并不具有代表性。多数人的精神伴侣绝不是在网上认识的。芝加哥心理学家、《傻瓜的恋爱关系》的作者凯特·沃克斯说，这种恋爱关系使人疲惫不堪，激情很快就会耗尽。
Before you even get started, you have to create your marketing pitch , get some decent photos, write an engaging profile, sometimes take a personality test. Then you scan hundreds, maybe thousands, of profiles and compose emails to the people you want to meet. If all this doesn't wear you out, the actual dates will.
甚至在你还没有开始之前，你就得进行一番行销宣传，弄一些体面的照片、写一份有吸引力的资料，有时还要参加性格测试。然后你要流览上百份、也许是上千份个人资料，接下来再给你想见面的人写电子邮件。如果所有这些还没有耗尽你的精力与热情，那么现实中的见面将会使它们统统耗尽。
That's, of course, if anyone bothers to email back. A lawsuit filed in December and seeking class-action status in U.S. District Court in Dallas alleges more than half the profiles on Match.com are "inactive, fake or fraudulent." Match. com general manager Mandy Ginsberg says the site's full-time fraud-prevention team works to identify and block fake profiles, including IP addresses that are in specific countries where fraud is prevalent or that try to set up multiple profiles. There are 1.7 million paid subscribers on the site, Ms. Ginsberg says, and fraud happens to very few of them.
而如果有人不嫌麻烦，回复了你的邮件，情况更是如此。一桩 12月份提起的诉讼宣称，默契网上超过一半的资料都是"无效、虚假或是具有欺诈性的"。这起诉讼正向达拉斯地方法院申请成为集体诉讼。默契网的总经理曼蒂·金斯伯格说，该网站有专门的打假小组负责查找并屏蔽虚假资料，包括来自造假现象猖獗的特定国家的IP地址，以及那些试图建立多份个人资料的IP地址。金斯伯格说，该网站有170万付费使用者，提供虚假资讯的只是很少一些人。
"Online dating is a lot of time for very little return," says Jeff Koleba, 31 , a Manhattan consumer-brand manager. At one point, he had active profiles on five dating sites. He says he found it draining to come home each night and study profiles, draft clever emails to the women he was attracted to, and then often receive no response. He recently quit online dating.
31岁的杰夫·科勒巴是曼哈顿一名消费者品牌经理，他说网上交友是一件颇为费时但却没什么回报的事情。他曾经是五个交友网站的活跃会员。他说，他每晚回家都要查看其他人的资料，并将精心构思的电子邮件发给他中意的女子，但之后却往往杳无音信，这让他感觉很疲惫，最近他已经放弃了网上交友。
Now, Mr. Koleba tries to meet women when he is out and about -taking improvisational comedy classes, playing on a co-ed intramural soccer team, exercising with a runners group. "It' s easy to talk, because we already share a common interest." he says. "So at least you'll usually get a decent conversation, even if it winds Up5 going nowhere dating-wise."
现在，科勒巴试着走出家门，到外面去接触女性，他参加了即兴戏剧表演班，在男女混合足球队中踢球，还与一个跑步团体一起锻炼。他说，找人搭腔很容易，因为我们已经有了一项共同的兴趣。所以通常来说你至少可以有一次愉快的谈话经历，即便它最终不是朝着恋爱的方向发展。
Where can you meet Mr. or Ms. Right without going online (or to a bar)? I've asked around and heard these suggestions: Home Depot. The airport. The supermarket produce section. (Whole Foods and Trader Joe' s have "the best looking and healthiest prospects," according to a musician friend of mine.)
除了上网(或是酒吧)，在哪儿可以遇见自己的意中人呢?我四处打听，得到了这些建议:家得宝，机场，超市的农产品区。(我的一个音乐家朋友说，在全食超市和乔氏超市美食店有机会碰到"最好看、最健康的另一半"。)
I had some luck recently at a triathlon6 finish line in Miami, and I didn't even have to break a sweat. I was there with my sister, Rachel, to cheer on my brother-in-law, J.J., who was running in his first race. I was waiting on a break wall by the water when a handsome man in running shorts sat down next to me. He asked if I was waiting for a husband or boyfriend, and I suddenly developed a southern accent: "Whah noooo, Ahm not! "
最近在迈阿密一项三项全能赛事的终点线附近我交上了"桃花运而且还不费吹灰之力。当时我和妹妹瑞秋一起，在那儿为第一次参加比赛的妹夫J.J.加油。我正在水边的防洪堤上等着，这时一位穿着运动短裤的帅气男子坐到了我身边。他问我是不是在等男友或是丈夫，我用不知从哪儿冒出来的南方口音告诉他，不是。
Then it hit me: Here was a mass of people in skimpy outfits who were clearly very fit and had their ages written right on the back of their calves! It was easy to find things to say. We chatted about the race. Mr. Triathlon got to brag a little, and I got to show my nurturing side, asking concerned questions and offering to get him more water. I was having a great time until my sister appeared abruptly and announced that her husband was exhausted and we needed to leave immediately.
我突然意识到:这里的很多人都穿着紧身而暴露的运动服，身材显然棒极了，他们的年龄也从各自的小腿肚上得到了清晰的体现。找到话题很容易。我们聊了聊这次比赛。这位"三项全能"先生免不了吹嘘了一番，而我也展示了自己温柔体贴的一面，问了一些关心他的问题，还问他是否还需要水。我聊得很开心，直到我妹妹突然出现，说她丈夫体力透支，我们得马上离开。
Last year, Karen Jordan methodically told friends, family and acquaintances that she was looking to meet a man who was "kind, generous, accomplished yet humble." "To me, it's just like when you are looking for a new job," says the owner of a Los Angeles skin-care company. "It's a matter of asking for help." She met her boyfriend through someone in her church choir.
卡伦·乔丹在洛杉矶经营着一家护肤中心，去年她在向亲朋好友谈到自己想找一个什么样的人时，一条条地列出了她的条件:善良、慷慨、事业有成但要为人谦逊。她说，对我而言，这就好像是在找一份新的工作。这是我在寻求帮助。后来，她通过教会唱诗班的一个人结识了现在的男朋友。
After Lisa Jenkins, 42, a Clarkston, Wash, marketing consultant, got divorced several years ago, she came up with a method she calls "reverse stalking." Once or twice a week, she frequented places she found interesting -bookstores, art galleries, a bistro, a charity, at about the same time of day. "People who might be interested in you know where to find you when they finally get up the courage to ask you out," she says.
42岁的丽莎·詹金斯是华盛顿州克拉克斯顿的一名行销顾问，几年前离异后，她想出了一种她称之为"逆向追踪"的方法。她每周会到她认为有意思的地方去一两次——书店、画廊、某家酒吧、某个慈善团体，每次都在差不多的时间去。她说，当 那些可能对你感兴趣的人终于鼓足勇气约你出去时，他们会知道去哪儿找你。
While volunteering on a fund-raiser for a local college art center, she met another volunteer, who asked her to lunch. Three years later, they are engaged. "I am very glad I didn't leave it to chance," Ms. Jenkins says.
在为当地一所大学的艺术中心进行的募捐活动做义工期间，丽莎结识了另一名义工，他邀请她共进午餐。三年后，他们订婚了。丽莎说，我真庆幸自己当时没有听天由命。
Christopher Murray, 43, a Manhattan social worker, invited all his single gay friends to a game night at his apartment. Twelve men ate pizza and played a charades-like game called "celebrity" (you divide into teams and try to guess the names of famous people). Mr. Murray says the activity "allowed people to be interactive and work on a project together." His friend , Manhattan artist Joseph Cavalieri, 50, says, "It puts so much less pressure on you, because it's a group of people, so you are more relaxed."
43岁的克里斯多夫·穆雷是曼哈顿的一名社会工作者，他邀请他所有单身的同性恋朋友到自己的公寓共度游戏之夜。12个男人吃着披萨，玩起了"猜人名"游戏(参与者分成几组，试着猜出名人的名字)。穆雷说，这种活动增进了人与人之间的交流，让人们可以齐心协力地做一件事。他的朋友、50岁的曼哈顿艺术家乔瑟夫·卡瓦利里说，这种活动大大地缓解了你的压力，因为这是一群人，你也因此而更加放松。
How can you meet more people offline? Ask everyone you know for help. And be specific about what you are looking for, so you only get introduced to good prospects.
怎样才能在网络之外的现实生活中认识更多的人呢?向所有你认识的人求助。对于你想找什么样的人，尽量说得具体些，这样他们才会把有交往前景的对象介绍给你。
When you volunteer with your local alumni club. fund-raising event or political campaign, sign up for the job that gives you an excuse to call others.
当你在当地校友会、在募捐活动或是政治竞选活动中做志愿者时，为这份工作签订协约，这样你就有借口给别人打电话了。
Become the designated photographer at weddings, bar mitzvahs and other events. Shooting video of Uncle Phil's 90th birthday requires you to wander around and talk to people without being self-conscious.
在婚礼、成年礼以及其他活动中担任指定摄影师。设想一下，作为菲尔叔叔90岁生日宴会的摄影师，你当然得四处走走，还可以很自然地与人搭话而不会显得突兀。
Put down the device. Get your head out of your smart phone, computer or iPad. You won't seem approachable if no one can see your face.
放下各种电子设备。将你的目光从智慧于机、电脑或是iPad上移开。如果没人能看清你的脸，你会显得拒人于千里之外的样子。
Smile more. Pretend you're on vacation, a time when most people are more approachable and talk more to strangers.
多笑一笑。想象你正在度假，人们在度假时往往会更容易接近，也会与陌生人有更多的交谈。
Travel in business class. People are less grumpy, more chatty. And there are free drinks.
选择商务舱。那里的人脾气没那么坏，也更健谈。那儿还有免费的饮料。
Move to a neighborhood or a building that seems to have lots of people you'd like to meet.
如果一个社区或是一座大楼中似乎有许多你乐意结识的人，搬去那里。
Borrow a cute puppy and walk it someplace with sidewalk cafes. Or take it to the dog run. But be sure to own up to the fact that it isn't your dog: You don't want to get caught in a lie before your first date.
借一只可爱的小狗，牵着它到有露天咖啡馆的地方去。或是把它带到专门的遛狗场所。但务必要爽快地承认这不是你的狗:你不希望在第一次约会前就被发现撒了谎吧。
事业与爱情之间的取舍
Choosing a Career over Love
事业与爱情之间的取舍
The choice between having a career or making time for love is an extremely personal and individual decision. There are many factors which can affect your choice, and there are many people who have discovered how to achieve a healthy work life balance that allows them to have both.
事业与爱情之间的选择是一个非常私人的决定。有许多因素能够影响你的选择，许多人已经发现了怎样获得健康的事业与生活的平衡点，从而可以鱼与熊掌兼得。
Careers and love fulfill us in different but important ways. Having a solid career gives us a sense of accomplishment and self worth, aside from the practicalities of paying the bills. Many people develop their entire identity based upon what they do, elevating their career to a level of great importance in their lives.
事业与爱情以截然不同但都非常重要的方式给我们带来满足感。拥有稳定的工作，除了能够让我们支付各种账单的实用性之外，还可以给我们以成就感，并能够充分实现自我价值。许多人正是在事业的基础上确立了自己的身份和地位，并将他们的职业提升到了生活中非常重要的高度。
Then there are those who measure their success in terms of having a pleasant and rewarding home life. They develop their identities based upon the accomplishments of their children, and derive their self worth through the love and support of a spouse.
然而，也有人是以拥有愉悦、满意的家庭生活为标准来衡量自己的成功的。他们将自己的身份和地位建立在孩子的成就基础之上，他们的自我价值是通过配偶的爱和支持体现出来的。
So what happens if you cannot or do not wish to make room in your life for both? While the happiest and healthiest people have managed to develop a work life balance that allows for both, it may not be for everyone. Consider these factors when pondering which is more important for you.
如果你在生活中无法或没有希望兼顾这两方面，那会怎么样呢?虽然最幸福和最健康的人已经设法拥有了事业与生活的平衡，做到了两者兼得，但并不是每个人都能如此。在权衡哪方面对你更重要的时候，不妨考虑一下这些因素。
1. Your career may be more important when you are young Many people these days focus on careers first and family later. The reasoning is that, while you are young and unencumbered, you have the time and energy to fully devote yourself to a career. If you have lofty career ambitions while you are young, it may indeed be the time to start making progress towards those goals.
1.在你年轻的时候，事业可能更重要
现在有许多人都是先考虑事业，后考虑家庭。理由是，在年轻力壮、毫无牵挂的时候，你的时间和精力可以全部投入到事业中去。如果你在年轻的时候拥有远大的事业心，那的确应该抓住时机，向着那些目标前进。
Once you get married and begin to build a family, much of your time and energy -by necessity -becomes devoted to your family. This is as it should be. You should not start a family unless you are willing to devote time and attention to your loved ones.
一旦你结了婚，开始组建家庭，你的许多时间和精力就必然要投入到家庭之中。这是理所应当的。如果你不想将时间和注意力投入到你所爱的人身上，你就不应该成家。
Many people who accomplish great success in their careers when they are young, and establish themselves in a secure position, are then more willing and comfortable later on to devote themselves to family. By the time they do settle down, they are more prepared to handle the responsibility.
许多人在年轻的时候就已经在事业上功成名就，在建立了稳固的地位之后，会更愿意专注于舒适的家庭生活。等到定下心来成家立室的时候，他们已经充分做好了承担家庭职责的准备。
2. Falling in love can be better when you are older
More and more people these days are choosing to wait when it comes to making decisions about family. It is not unusual for people to delay marriage until their late 30's or even their early 40's. Delaying family decisions allows you to be better prepared for those obligations, and creates a better Ukelibood5 that you are in touch with your most important goals and values. You have had the opportunity to completely grow up, greatly reducing the chances of feeling like you are "missing out." You have had the chance to purge the foolishness of youth from your system and are now confident with the wisdom of maturity.
2.成熟稳重时恋爱会更好
如今有越来越多的人在提到成家的决定时都选择等待。许多人会等到30多岁甚至40出头的时候才结婚，这已经不是什么奇怪的事了。晚成家的决定可以使你对那些家庭义务进行更充分的准备，并使你更有可能实现自己的人生目标和价值。你拥有完全的成长机会，可以最大限度地减少你觉得有所遗憾的可能性。此外，你还有机会蜕去青春的无知，充满自信地展现你的成熟和睿智。
3. Choosing Both
If you can find a work life balance that allows you to experience the joys of love and maintain a successful career, you will have a truly happy and rewarding life. A loving family at Home can help you celebrate all of your successes, and bolster your confidence through your failures. There are many people out there reaping the tremendous rewards that come with including love and work in their lives, and finding the balance that allows for both.
3.两者皆选
如果你能够找到事业与生活的平衡点，能够在享受爱情的政愉同时还保持事业的成功，那么，你就会拥有真正幸福充实的人生。相亲相爱的家人，不仅能够在成 功时为你庆祝，还能在失败时帮你重拾信心。许多人已经找到了两者的平衡点，拥有了事业与爱情双丰收的美好人生。
A life that only has room for a career, or that includes a consuming love that stifles your personal development, is likely not a lifestyle that is healthy or fulfilling Our personal needs and feelings of self worth need to be met, which is normally gained from having a good career. Our hearts and souls need to be nourished , and we need companionship to support us through life, which normally are derived from loving relationships.
如果一个人的生活中只有事业，或者只有妨碍个人发展的强烈的爱情，那样的生活方式就不能算是健康的或成功的。我们个人的需求和自我价值感需要得到满足，而且常常都是通过拥有一个好工作来实现的;但我们的心灵也需要得到滋养，我们需要有伴侣与我们相互扶持度过漫长一生，而这常常是通过爱情来获得的。
The truly healthy and well balanced person will recognize the benefits of having both. He or she will take steps to achieve the work life balance necessary to assure the continuation of career growth while nurturing and maintaining the health of personal relationships. It is only when we can maintain this delicate balance that we are living life to its greatest potential.
真正健康、正常的人会认可同时拥有这两者的好处。他必定会设法取得事业与生活的平衡，确保在保持良好的人际关系的同时，能够继续事业的良好发展。只有当我们能够维持这种微妙的平衡时，我们才有可能拥有最完美幸福的生活。
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